I am Exercise Boy. I hate exercise. I find it to be a complete waste of time and efforts. Well maybe not complete, but pretty high on the wastefulness chart. Yes, I do exercise. Why, you ask? I'm not really sure. Perhaps I'm preparing myself for that fateful day when I'll need my tenaciously accrued strength and my painfully forged conditioning. Zombiegheddon.. Perhaps I'm trying to look a certain way to be more attractive since athleticism tends to be biologically rewarded by the opposite sex. Perhaps I'm trying to find a purpose in the process. Or, more likely, I just don't have anything else on the table for a couple hours a day.
Over the years, I've come to the conclusion that none of us know anything. Especially in the realm of health and fitness. I can give you one certainty though. WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE! None of us are going to make it out alive. So the thought of living a long life is asinine. It's pointless. Why delay the inevitable? You're just going to become a brain-dead, valuable-resource-consuming, pile of mush. You're idea of being old is merely a nuisance to the subsequent generations. You like taking care of your grandma? No! No one does. So quit being a pain in everyones ass about how long you plan on living; we're all cheering against you anyway. Have fun and don't go gently. If your biggest goal is to look good for your own funeral, then you might as well end it now. No point in holding out, you're not going to look any better.
This leads into what I call "fitness". All that means to me is the degree to which one can avert death. At some point, we'll all score a zero. But until then, it might behoove you to invest in that degree if the things you do demand it. I figure if all I wanted to do was sit on the couch, I really don't need much more "fitness" than the ability to take a few shallow breaths every once in a while. But I get bored and testosterone makes me itch. I like doing stupid things for no good reason. These things often entail inherited risks and physical demands beyond those of couch-surfing. So I try to prepare myself with some physical training.
This leads me to my method. I only do what is necessary to accomplish my goal. No need to rub it in. If you're going to kill a bear, you're not going to keep straining yourself once it's dead.. The task is done. Such is with training or anything else in life for that matter. Finish what you set out to do and move on. So I like to think that I have narrowed down exercise to the barely-tolerable minimal essential. And that is what I'll try to convey here.
I will express mostly opinion and blanketing statements with very little to support it. Why? Because people seem to believe it more. Think about it. The only reason you think whole grains are healthy is because that's that a guy wearing a lab coat said on TV and everyone repeated it. Can I back my shit up? Yep. But it's a waste of time. The more science I present, the more room for debate I open. And I don't have time for debates. So if you disagree with something, that's fine, carry on your merry way. If it works for you, then you're right.. But then again, why are you scouring the internet for information to begin with? What stimulated that curiosity? Perhaps you're wrong.
Who am I to spread information with such gusto? No one. But I've spent a minute or two on the topics that I present and have an alphabet soup of abbreviations and acronyms after my name representing all of the useless certifications that I've stumbled upon and somehow aced the exams.
With all that said, please enjoy the crap I write. Take everything with a grain of salt, because like I insinuated earlier, none of this shit matters. We're all dying of the same terminal disease: LIFE.
